I Am Not You and Vice Versa

I Am Not You and Vice Versa

One of the simplest and most powerful lessons that I am struggling to learn is that I have no control over anyone else and everyone else is different from me.

This is obvious and, at the same time, not obvious. I have never seen the universe through anyone else’s eyes and I have never processed the input of my senses with anyone else’s brain. Since my own perspective is the only one that I am familiar with, it seems natural that I would assume that everyone thinks like me.

I don’t think I’m alone in making this assumption but I might be wrong. Maybe everyone else is much smarter and more evolved than me. Maybe everyone else figured this out when they were four and there is something terribly wrong with me.

I kind of doubt it.

I don’t doubt that there is something wrong with me. I know there is. I just think that we all assume that everyone should think like us. The fact that they don’t is frustrating. In fact, that’s one of the biggest sources of frustration (not to mention conflict, violence and war) in the world.

Let me stop the irresponsible speculation and bring it back to a subject I can speak about with some authority.

Me.

When I am upset with someone close to me, it’s usually because they have reacted to something in a way that is different than the way I think they should react. When I remember that they are different from me I can remember that communication is needed. Communication between two related but separate entities. That takes effort. It may take time and even some translation.

But it works better than the non-existent mind control or telepathy that I often try to employ.

Hope this is helpful to someone. If it isn’t, it’s a sign that I’m nuts.

Or rather, another sign.

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